over the edge
I think this situation with Sophie and the boyfriend was the straw that has broken the camels back. I think it has tipped me over the edge. I am not coping. Not coping at all. I am trying but it is not working. I know this is not about me - but in a way it is. I am taking her pain on, to the point of my heart feels that it has been broken. I have a terrible ache in the middle of my breast bone and I feel a heavy sadness that I can't shake. I have two packages here that I received yesterday that I have no interest in opening. My garden hasn't been looked at all week. I can't even blog. I have lost interest in my home and for those who know me well - that is a big sign that something is wrong. I am not functioning. I walk past Sophie and see her sad and ask how she is then I feel her pain. Physically. I know it is advisable to shut my chakras down but I can't. I physically can't. Not that I don't want to, I just cannot do it, it doesn't happen. I have lost touch with my angels. I am a reiki master - you can use reiki to heal yourself. Right now, I am incapable of healing myself, or anyone else for that matter. I feel like crying all the time. I need help. Not pills & chemicals but spiritual help. Healing help. So today, I am finding someone.
I am going to have to cancel all the Christmas swaps - I just don't have the interest to organize them right now. I am also taking a break from posting here - not can't even say for how long - I am not even sure if I will get to visit any of my friends blogs. I feel so bad - I don't want to fall out of the loop, to fall away from the great circle of friends here. I am scared. I am also 48 and feel like an absolute idiot for not being able to cope with this. For heaven's sakes - this is but a hiccough - compared to other things that have happended in my life.
posted by Miss Robyn | 6:12 am
17 Comments:
Oh Robyn! Sophie is your baby, of course you feel her pain, you are a good Mother and you are helping Sophie, but you need to look after yourself, you are no good to anyone, if you are not doing so, go see another reiki healer, or indeed whoever you think can help you heal, and allow it to happen, something better awaits both you and Sophie, take care my friend xx
Oh sweetheart! You're just being a protective mother right now, which is your supreme focus. All the rest will fall into place. It's alright to take a break and take care of YOU, not just Sophie. It sounds like you're experiencing sensory overload at the moment. Rest, sleep, heal. We'll still be here when you need us. xo
Robyn, this is not a time to go away from us. It is a time to snuggle right into the middle of us all and let us love you up.
You and Sophie will get through this. I have a feeling it's about much, much more. There's been so much lately.
Isn't your husband's appointment this week? There's your worry for him, the disappointment with Ms. Virtue and now Sophie's pain and I bet more things. Also, True Balance makes us feel the pain on the road to helping us balance everything..or at least it does me, by dredging up stuff I tried to forget, yet I know that it is precisely this "stuff" that is keeping me from my full potential.
I love you Robyn. Don't go away, ok? Let us help you through it.
Hi miss*R
Have a good break. I'll look for you in a few weeks.
Sometimes it is the small hiccoughs that are the final straw! You have just had too much stress piled on you. I won't say 'healer heal yourself' because I believe if a healer like you is in such a terible state you must look for a healer yourself. Hope you find someone who can help you.
Dear Robyn,
What a sensitive and deeply empathic person you are! Don't try to change or shut down - life is about feeling and experiencing these emotional/spiritual highs and lows. This too shall pass and you and your daughter will be all the stronger and better off for it. Your bond with her must be intense.
Though this is painful, think of it as another birth - you'll come out the other side fresh and new and with a little more wisdom.
I hope you take some time for R and R and realign those chakras you keep talking about. :)
I am coming right over with a cuppa tea and some cakes! Sometimes life is overwhelming and very hard to come 'round. Remember the Law of Attraction. The more you tell yourself you are in pain ..when you name that pain(as in pain in chest)it manifests as such. You can make yourself ill. Try to refocus your energies on the good things around you, Your garden, your wonderful art,... Sophie, as the beautiful daughter she is. I know this may sound "easy for me to say". I just know it to be true! Try this" Write down a list of all the things you are GLAD for in your life(Pollyanna,yeah)It will start to release you ,I promise it will! THIS TOO SHALL PASS..much love to a Glitter Sister with a beautiful soul. Namaste
Dearest Robyn I know your heart is breaking for your lovely baby. But please take care of yourself. Try not to worry so much. Easy to say hard to do I know. If you feel you must atke a break from this blogging thing, then by all means do so. But remember we will be here when you feel like "Talking". Don't close yourself off from all of us if you can possibly help it. Sending you love and (((((((Big Hugs))))))
miss*R you are so true. It is amazing that you admit to your feelings, and you openly say "I can't do this". The Universe wants you to stop everything and take a break. You are listening, so it sounds to me like your angels are communicating to you just fine. Sometimes what we need isn't what we had in mind.
You deserve to be well. You are indeed healing yourself. Take care and you are bookmarked here at the spa so we won't lose you.
Many prayers coming your way.
xo
keeping you in my thoughts
Robyn, you do what you need to do to get well and happy. We will be here when you feel better. Take care of yourself and your baby. loveyou.
Robyn
I was very sad to read this post. And hear the pain you are in. You are a very loving person and it is natural that you are feeling Sophie's pain.
You will be ok. I know it all seems so incredibly hard right now but it will be ok.
Take the time out you need but don't forget we are here to love you and support you. You are a very tender soul and you have been through so much lately.
Will be keeping you closer in my heart than usual.
Much love
Dotee xoxo
Robyn, Blue the Spa girl speaks for both of us xx
You know where to find me, and everyone here , should you need us.
We love you.
Take all the time you need to heal and feel better. You have to take care of your self before you can help others. Hugs and prayers and good blessings sent your way my friend.
Robyn I am sending you the angel of healing courage and strength... ***FLUTTER FLUTTER*** She's on your shoulder now **.
You must try to give your daughter a Reiki treatment and perhaps you may surprise yourself. You both must allow posative energies into your space.Perhaps you can begin by opening a journal at the end of the day and write down "ONE" blessing.Each day
review the day before entry and I am sure before you know it the sun will shine within your heart.Have you tried visulization therapy? Allow that "bright light" to come in! Feel better
your daughter too! HUGS NG
Sending you (and your daughter) lots and LOTS of healing thoughts and hugs!!!
XOXO
I can absolutely identify with your deeply sad feelings for your heard broken daughter Robyn. I know how it feels to be heart broken and I guess when that would happen to my baby I would feel the same pain again with her. Only time can heal but there will still be a pain when you listen to your heart. *sigh*
I'm wishing for better times for you and Sophie! Hugs xox
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